"I told him things that I would do, and he said, 'No way!' and I said, 'Way!'"
-- Trump, recounting a conversation with Vladimir Putin

"It's unfair that I beat him and now I have to beat her, too."
-- Trump

"He has positions that it's not even possible to believe that they exist."
-- Trump on Walz

"We have a lot of bad things coming up... In my opinion we're very close to a world war. We have people who don't know how to handle it. We have a very, very sick country right now."
-- Trump

"It's amazing. I can't even believe it. I've been so lucky in terms of that whole world, it is a dangerous world out there. It's like Vietnam, sort of. It is my personal Vietnam. I feel like a great and very brave soldier."
-- Trump in 1997, on avoiding STDs while single

"We should just seize the administrative state for our own purposes...Fire every single mid-level bureaucrat, every civil servant in the administrative state, replace them with our people. And then when the courts stop you, stand before the country, like Andrew Jackson did, and say, 'The Chief Justice has made his ruling, now let him enforce it.'...And we have to honestly and aggressively attack the universities in this country."
-- J.D.Vance's advice to Trump

"What are the chances that Crooked Joe Biden, the WORST President in the history of the U.S., whose Presidency was Unconstitutionally STOLEN from him by Kamala, Barrack HUSSEIN Obama, Crazy Nancy Pelosi, Shifty Adam Schiff, Cryin' Chuck Schumer, and others on the Lunatic Left, CRASHES the Democratic National Convention and tries to take back the Nomination, beginning with challenging me to another DEBATE?"
-- Trump

"Together we will stop Kamala Harris's nation-wreckting -- I tell you what, when you see what she's done to our nation, she's wrecking our nation."
-- Trump, rebooting after butchering the word "wrecking"

"I see Donald Trump talking about 'the wonderful Hannibal Lecter'...That is weird behavior. I don't think you can call it anything else."
-- Gov. Tim Walz

"If you've ever seen [Kamala Harris] with the laugh and everything else, that's a weird deal going on there. They're the weird ones...I'm a lot of things, but weird I'm not."
-- Trump

"When I was president, we weren't laughed at."
-- Trump, who was literally laughed at while giving a speech at the United Nations